Bacon

[avevale_intelligencer]

A while back, in that haven of reasoned discussion and dispassionate debate we call Facebook, I advanced the argument (in response to a quoted statement that the world would be better if we all became vegetarian) that if we all became vegetarian (which I think is unlikely) then all the animals in the world would suddenly be between us and the food, which historically has not been a very good place to be. I was roundly chastised for daring to argue with a Self-Evident Truth, and specifically for erecting a straw man.

Well, I'm not sure. I think there were bones in that straw. However, I went away and thought about other things, and then this morning what do I see but a basket of adorable little piglets and the caption "Seven reasons to ditch bacon."

Okay, let's try erecting this man one limb at a time, like Hangman in reverse, and we'll see if he's all straw or something a bit more solid.

Left Leg: Every person who ditches bacon is one less person buying bacon.

Right Leg: Every person not buying bacon is one less reason for shops to stock bacon.

Left Arm: Every shop not stocking bacon is one less reason for suppliers to pay for bacon.

Right Arm: Every supplier not paying for bacon is one less reason for farmers to raise pigs.

Torso: Farmers, believe me, do not do anything they do not need to do, i.e. that will not support the farm and their family. Farming's bloody hard work enough, no room for passengers.

Head: The more people ditch bacon, the fewer farmers will raise pigs, the fewer pigs there will be.

So those seven adorable little piglets (unless they are some family's pets, which would be absolutely marvellous as long as they know a pig is for life and not just for Christmas) are actually seven reasons not to ditch bacon.

I am very strongly in favour of animals being more humanely treated. I sign petitions to that effect, if I had spare money I would give to appropriate charities, when I buy meat I look for meat from farms that adhere to standards of animal welfare. And I continue to love pigs and to eat bacon, because whether it's a straw man or a slippery slope or an excluded middle or any other logical buzzword, I do not trust my species to keep animals alive just because some of us think they look nice.

So that's that.

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