The Tale of the Three Bold Investigators
Jul. 31st, 2006 10:31 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
avevale_intelligencer"Aye," one of the other men said, "this be he, right enough."
"Powerful hard job it were," said the third man, pulling something from his pocket and hitting the prisoner smartly on the back of the head. The prisoner subsided to the floor, and the man put the blackjack back in his pocket, grinning. "Powerful thirsty work," he added meaningly.
"Explain yourselves at once, man," Sir Louis barked.
"Well," said the first speaker, "that there lady Bird o' Grace, her what's now gone missin', she went to his lordship and she says--"
"That she had seen Mademoiselle de Douleur talking to a sallow man in Town," Master Shadman broke in. "She came to me with the same tale, and I confess I put no great faith in it."
"Well," said the man, "his lordship, he came to me, and he says, Nab my boy, I've a job for ye--"
"He did no sich thing," interjected the man with the blackjack. "It were me he came to, being as everyone knows Noll Treadgold for a good man of his hands--and don't you be openin' your mouth, Ned Kirk, you as was nowhere near when he came to us--" The second man looked aggrieved, but held his peace.
"So his lordship told us," Nab took up the tale again, "to go up to Lunnon and find this here sallow man and bring him to ye for questioning."
"And you thought to pick up some extra money and have a day out," Master Shadman said.
"The labourer is worthy of his hire," said Noll piously.
"So when we got to Lunnon," Nab went on doggedly, "Noll here says, he says, Why don't we try the alehouses first, and I says--"
"I never did!" Noll protested. "You'm a liar, Nab Hayward."
"So," Master Shadman said, and the edge of impatience in his voice quieted them, "having spent your first night in London getting rascally drunk, what did you do on the morrow?"
Nab looked uncomfortable. "Well, sir, us somehow found ourselves a bit hinsufficiently provided for the journey back, so I sent Ned and Noll to take up what you might call a charitable collection."
"Powerful generous folk were," Noll added with an evil grin.
"While I pursued my hinitiative," Nab said. "I went to his lordship's town house and told Scutella, him as is butler there, as I had a message for that there sallow man, and where could I find him?"
"Most ingenious," Shadman said drily. "And of course Scutella provided the information he had read on the stranger's card."
"You've hit it, Master Shadman," Nab said. "That's prezactly what he did. So I collected the lads and us went round there."
"Powerful big place it were," Noll put in.
"Yes, it would be," Sir Louis said grimly. "And then you three drunken ruffians lurked in hiding till this sallow fellow came out, knocked him over the head, bundled him into a sack and brought him back here, yes?"
"Post haste, Sir Louis," Ned said. It was his first utterance since the conversation had begun, and he seemed to like it, because he repeated it several times, chuckling. "Post haste."
"Well," said Master Shadman, "since the damage is done, we may as well see whom you have assaulted, abducted and maltreated, and how much trouble you, and your master, may be in."
The three bold investigators broke into a howl of denial, recrimination and argument, and Sir Louis was obliged to step in and knock their heads together. Master Shadman meanwhile undid the ropes that were securing the sack around the body, and pulled it off, revealing the dirty, tousled head and furiously glaring dark eyes of Count Whatsisname, Hereditary Impostor to the Court of somewhere or other.
"Oh, corks," said Sir Louis in a small voice.
"My government will hear about this," the Count snarled.
"Powerful hard job it were," said the third man, pulling something from his pocket and hitting the prisoner smartly on the back of the head. The prisoner subsided to the floor, and the man put the blackjack back in his pocket, grinning. "Powerful thirsty work," he added meaningly.
"Explain yourselves at once, man," Sir Louis barked.
"Well," said the first speaker, "that there lady Bird o' Grace, her what's now gone missin', she went to his lordship and she says--"
"That she had seen Mademoiselle de Douleur talking to a sallow man in Town," Master Shadman broke in. "She came to me with the same tale, and I confess I put no great faith in it."
"Well," said the man, "his lordship, he came to me, and he says, Nab my boy, I've a job for ye--"
"He did no sich thing," interjected the man with the blackjack. "It were me he came to, being as everyone knows Noll Treadgold for a good man of his hands--and don't you be openin' your mouth, Ned Kirk, you as was nowhere near when he came to us--" The second man looked aggrieved, but held his peace.
"So his lordship told us," Nab took up the tale again, "to go up to Lunnon and find this here sallow man and bring him to ye for questioning."
"And you thought to pick up some extra money and have a day out," Master Shadman said.
"The labourer is worthy of his hire," said Noll piously.
"So when we got to Lunnon," Nab went on doggedly, "Noll here says, he says, Why don't we try the alehouses first, and I says--"
"I never did!" Noll protested. "You'm a liar, Nab Hayward."
"So," Master Shadman said, and the edge of impatience in his voice quieted them, "having spent your first night in London getting rascally drunk, what did you do on the morrow?"
Nab looked uncomfortable. "Well, sir, us somehow found ourselves a bit hinsufficiently provided for the journey back, so I sent Ned and Noll to take up what you might call a charitable collection."
"Powerful generous folk were," Noll added with an evil grin.
"While I pursued my hinitiative," Nab said. "I went to his lordship's town house and told Scutella, him as is butler there, as I had a message for that there sallow man, and where could I find him?"
"Most ingenious," Shadman said drily. "And of course Scutella provided the information he had read on the stranger's card."
"You've hit it, Master Shadman," Nab said. "That's prezactly what he did. So I collected the lads and us went round there."
"Powerful big place it were," Noll put in.
"Yes, it would be," Sir Louis said grimly. "And then you three drunken ruffians lurked in hiding till this sallow fellow came out, knocked him over the head, bundled him into a sack and brought him back here, yes?"
"Post haste, Sir Louis," Ned said. It was his first utterance since the conversation had begun, and he seemed to like it, because he repeated it several times, chuckling. "Post haste."
"Well," said Master Shadman, "since the damage is done, we may as well see whom you have assaulted, abducted and maltreated, and how much trouble you, and your master, may be in."
The three bold investigators broke into a howl of denial, recrimination and argument, and Sir Louis was obliged to step in and knock their heads together. Master Shadman meanwhile undid the ropes that were securing the sack around the body, and pulled it off, revealing the dirty, tousled head and furiously glaring dark eyes of Count Whatsisname, Hereditary Impostor to the Court of somewhere or other.
"Oh, corks," said Sir Louis in a small voice.
"My government will hear about this," the Count snarled.
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Date: 2006-08-01 02:00 pm (UTC)I love it, Zander. :)