That's certainly what I'm talking about. And if anyone can show me a good cause to do so, in this context--a cause in which triggering an unhelpful/negative emotional reaction would actually further a good resolution of the situation--well, I'll be enlightened.

I'm re-reading "The Ball And The Cross" at the moment (Chesterton again) in which a Catholic and an atheist resolve to fight a duel to settle their disagreement (and keep getting interrupted before they can finish it, which might tell at least the Catholic something). Of course, part of GKC's bias was that he saw fighting, at least metaphorically, as a good way to resolve things like this. I don't. Hence my stance.