There is a (very) long but interesting discussion going on at the moment about rape, and (different) men's attitudes, particularly not just to avoiding doing it, but actively avoiding it happening. A lot of what has been said touches on what you write here: one of the main threads is about men who are the Good Guys in this needing to talk to other men (who aren't, necessarily) about their attitudes, because many of the latter aren't going to take notice when a woman says the same thing.

Obviously, other aspects on your list directly touch on that issue as well; cereta's conclusion is quite similar to yours, but just maybe with a touch more hope. At least, I've found many of the comments to give me some. I've found one of the discussions I've had with a boy I otherwise respect rather depressing, though, in that he doesn't believe that it's nearly the problem that cereta and her commenters suggest, even after my explaining that I've been sexually assaulted multiple times, and that my experience is not the least bit unusual (except, perhaps, that so far, it's not gone as far as rape). I wonder what would happen if a man confronted him with it...